Resource Family Book Club ~ Reading Between the Lines

Come and join us for a fun and relaxing book club! Each month we will read a portion of the book and have a meaningful discussion.

Contact ACRF for a copy of the book if you need one and join us!

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  1. Was there any part of this portion of the book that stood out to you?
  2. On page 13 it says “statistically speaking, only 3% of foster youth graduate from college” are you aware of any resources for foster/adoptive children to attend college?
  3. In what ways or with what tools will you use to support the youth in your home when they talk with you about their traumatic experiences?
  4. Have you had a child in your home go through the same or similar experiences as Alexis or Justin?
  5. Justin talked about the struggle of wanting validation and to be loved by his parents even with everything that he went through. Have the children in your home struggled with similar feelings from their bioparents?
  6. It was stated by both Justin and Alexis in part 2 on pages 71 and 78 “why me?” but for different reasons. What were those reasons and how are they similar and how were they different?



  1. Was there any part of this portion of the book that stood out to you?
  2. The quote on page 89 “the façade I portrayed at school combined with the mental and emotional warfare I had waiting for me at home, often resulted in me crying alone in the bathroom.” Have children in your home expressed similar survival behaviors?
  3. What were some examples of why Alexis and Justin had a hard time with attachment?
  4. On page 120 it discusses redefining normal. In what ways do you as foster/adoptive parents have to help the children in your home redefine their normal?
  5. Have you heard of ACEs, Adverse Childhood Experiences? With knowing that study what do you predict the children in your home ACE scores are?
  6. Justin talks about peace and forgiveness over revenge. How would you help the child in your home through that process?

April 8: ASSIGNMENT: Read Pages 175-272


  1. Was there any part of this portion of the book that stood out to you?
  2. Holidays and anniversary dates are especially challenging for children who are in or have experienced the foster system. Have the children in your care expressed any behaviors around have you determined any specific triggers?
  3. On page 212 the quote says “when someone says they love you, they can’t mean it without knowing who the real you is” how do you help the children in your home show the “real them”?
  4. Page 219 Angela said “what you went through doesn’t have to define you. It can be reframed as a journey from pain to power, from struggle to liberation.” In what ways can we support youth to reframe their journey?
  5. Think of how challenging it must have been for both Alexis and Justin to remove biological family members from their lives and how badly Justin was still affected by wanting a relationship with his family and yet it being a source of tension in his relationship with Alexis. How will you support your child when they are experiencing this struggle?
  6. On page 269 it says “how can you redefine normal in your life or in the community around you?” What is your answer to that question?